5 Phrases for Becoming Assertive
Vikki Carrel Vikki Carrel
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 Published On Jan 15, 2012

Check out my follow up video "Navigating Narcissism."    • Navigating Narcissism (follow up with...  

Clear, direct communication is the key to getting what you want. But what does that sound like? Author, Vikki Carrel, shares five phrases to help you become more assertive.
Assertive Communication is the ability to honestly express your feelings or opinions without anxiety or anger. Assertive communication should not be confused with aggressive behavior. Assertive behavior is clear and direct communication.
1. I am not prepared to support that idea.

Act and speak assertive -Avoid adding qualifiers to your opinions and feelings

2. When you interrupt me I feel angry.

Take responsibility for yourself and your feelings.

-Use I statements

3. You have come home late the past few nights - I am concerned.

Focus on the facts.

-Talk about the problem - not about blaming or accusing

4. I see that you are frustrated and I understand your reaction - let's talk again tomorrow.

Allow time to cool down and process.

- Defuse an unproductive outcome

5. Here is my receipt - I would like to return this dress and get my money back.

Keep repeating your request.

-Avoid arguing or being manipulated

Vikki Carrel is an author, speaker and founder of The Empowerment Project. www.vikkicarrel.com

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