Keywords: love and sexual drive, resonance and reflection, civilisation and emotion, making love without sexual stimulation, making love, the nature of man and his sexual drive, the difference between man and woman, woman is fundamentally love, man's sexual drive seeks to possess, woman fundamentally wants to love and to give, moving from sex to love

Outline:

0:00 On resonance and attraction. The inter-connected and inter-penetrating nature of all existence. The individual's inherent love and connection to the divine. Love within is reflected through external world, resonating with objects and circumstances.

6:10 The nature of the male sexual drive and its selfish aspects. Men and women are fundamentally different, with men driven by a desire to possess and women driven by a desire to love and to give. The two drives and its consequence. The sexual drive is the main impediment to realizing one's true nature and source of love.

12:02 Emotion and evolution. Civilization is a protection of self, leading to selfishness and hardness. Overcoming emotion is necessary for the evolution of man and woman on Earth.

20:52 Woman and sexuality. Woman is the only hope of stopping men's sexual drive. Woman must know what she wants - sex or love – can she say no to sex but yes to love? The importance of a woman being sensitive to love and not giving into sexual advances.

27:10 Love, sex, and relationships. On making love without sexual arousal. On prioritizing love over sexual drive in relationships. What happens when lovers first meet and why love goes out of the relationship. On compromise. Woman is fundamentally a 100% love and man is 90% love with 10% something to do.

Extracts:

We've got to get this – that the external world is there as a reflection – as a reflector of what we are. Often, you can say the other thing – that the external world reflects as circumstances – it reflects what we are or what is necessary for us to cope with.

When you love an object – this is what this external world is for – you reflect off that object; and your love reflects off that object. It doesn't reflect off this one or that one or that one; it somehow or the other resonates with that particular object. You resonate with that particular object. And there is a correspondence between the two.

All love fundamentally is the love of That – the love of God, the love of It – That which is behind everything, behind all existence. All love is that. You have that love inside of you because you came out of that place, that vastness, into conception in some woman's womb. You came out of that place. And to that place, your consciousness and intelligence will return. So, you have that love inside of you, where there are no problems, where there is no movement, where there are no bodies, where there is no necessity for separation, because all is one, although you have an individual consciousness, you cannot separate the part from the whole. The part which is the individual consciousness is the part of the whole and, therefore, cannot be separated from it.

Woman is a totally different creature to man. Woman's desire is not to possess – in her immediacy, her love is to give – her love is to give and to please man. Her desire is to give everything to him – to be able to open up completely and utterly to the male principle – that's what love is.

Woman is the hope of it all – of stopping man, and how does she do this? She's got to know – 'What do I want,' 'Do I want sex or do I want love?' That's the fundamental question that's coming at you, woman.

~

Barry Long was a spiritual teacher who taught internationally from the 1980's up until his death in 2003. His spiritual teaching is grounded in practicality and addresses all aspects of modern day life.

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