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When negotiating a divorce settlement, you need to understand what trade-offs you’re making, and make sure that you’re keeping the big picture in mind. When it comes to your assets, and the debts that you have in your financial life and your marriage, they are what they are. When you’re thinking about your divorce settlement and your future, your goal, really, is to figure out what the best combination of assets is for you, so that you can move on with your life in the best way possible.

You need to be realistic and reasonable, and make sure you’re negotiating for things that make sense for you. One of the biggest areas I see people having trouble is not being accepting of what the status quo, what today, what their actual financial picture is, and not confronting head-on what you actually have. I understand everyone wishes they had more money, more cash, less debt, higher income, or whatever it is. What I see, oftentimes, in the divorce process, when working with you, is that you might feel, or at least pretend to negotiate as if you have a higher income than you have, or as if you have more money than you actually have. I’ll say this on calls all the time, it’s okay to advocate for yourself and ask for a little bit more to that you get … you have wiggle room. But at the same time, you need to be realistic about your financial picture is and what your future looks like, and be real about how that’s going to work for you in the future.