IRDs are patterns of habitual interactions that make partners react automatically, in set ways. You have the same argument over and over. It feels like you’re in a bad play; you both know your lines, actions, and reactions.

Once an IRD gets activated, the content doesn’t matter. Whether serious or trivial, partners slip into habitual reactions. Instead of working as a team to solve the problem. they see each other as the problem. https://compassionpower.com/intimate-...