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The Perfect House - Marriage Advice ᴴᴰ ┇ Amazing Reminder ┇ by Sheikh Assim Al Hakeem ┇ TDR Production ┇

Assalaamu Alaikum Wa Rahmatullahi Wa Barakaathuhu

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Speaker: Shaykh Assim AlHakeem

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The Perfect House : Marriage Advice ᴴᴰ - by Sheikh Assim Al-Hakeem

In our household, we would like to have a righteous husband and a righteous wife. This is our model family, this is our ideal family, but does this mean that there are no fights? Not fights, but, here and there. The Prophet (ﷺ) with Aisha - Aisha used to be upset with him sometimes. Imagine?! Ai'sha, being upset of the Prophet of Allah?! This is normal. This is how a man and his wife... It has nothing to do with the Messenger and the servants of Allah. It has to do with a man and his wife. And the Prophet (ﷺ) said this. 'O Aisha, I know when you are pleased with me, and I know when you are angry.' He said this out of the blue. They were happy, so they were just chit chatting. So he said, 'I know when you are angry, and I know when you are not.' She said, 'How do you know that Prophet of Allah?' He says, 'When you are angry, you say 'No! By Ibrahim's Lord!', and when you are happy you say 'No! By Muhammad's Lord!''. And she said, 'Yes Prophet of Allah, this is true. I do not abandon anything except your name. I love you, but when I am angry, I do not call your name.' Fathima and Ali (may Allah be pleased with them) also they used to have skirmishes. The Prophet came once to his daughter's house, 'Where is Ali?' she said 'he got angry, we had something, and we fought over something, so he went to the masjid. So the Prophet (ﷺ) goes to the masjid and finds Ali sleeping on the floor, and he wakes him up and he says, 'Stand up, the father of dust!', because he was sleeping on the soil. And he said, 'This is the most beautiful name, I would never ever trade it for anything.' Abaa Turaab - This is his nickname (may Allah be pleased with him). Umar (may Allah be pleased with him) A man has a fight with his wife, and he is so outraged of her character, so he goes to Umar to complain, the Khalifah, the Caliph. So he knocks on the door, and they tell him 'wait for a second' and all what he hears, is Umar's wife shouting at him! Umar's wife is shouting! And he can hear that. He said, 'Haha, I am coming to complain to Umar? He needs help more than I do!' So, the guy goes away, and then Umar rushes to the door and, 'Where's the man? Come, what is it my brother?' He says, 'Nothing, nothing, I had a problem, but I think you need the help more than I do.' He said, 'My brother, this is my wife. She cooks my food, she bakes my bread, she washes my clothes. She suckles and breast-feeds my children, and she does not have to do all of that! And, not only that, my heart is calm and I don't have to look for haram when she is with me. Don't you think I should tolerate her as she is tolerating me?.' Wallahi, if we look at our spouses...with this way, we would live a beautiful life. Because then, we, whenever Shaythan comes to us and says, 'Do this' or 'Do that', I say no! She tolerates me. My wife tolerates me. I have a lot of shortcomings. So if she cooks the food that is bad and half-burnt, and no salt in it, I will eat it, I will eat 3 or 4 bites of it, and I say, 'May Allah bless you, the food was excellent' and I`m lying. Why? Because I don't take her out, I don't buy her presents, I am not kind to her, I am not a perfect husband, so I tolerate her shortcomings hoping from Allah Azzawajal that she tolerates my shortcomings and by this, we would have "the perfect house". And Allah Azzawajal knows best. I pray to Allah (subahaanahu wa Ta'ala) that he would fix all our shortcomings and that he would make our houses, ideal Muslim houses, wAllahu 'Alam. (Ameen)