Christians ✞ Silicon Valley
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 Published On Aug 19, 2018

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Christianity in Silicon Valley (Palo Alto) ✝✞✟☦☨☥† 🤦 😅😂😭 ↓↓↓↓

What is your religious view?
Christianity ✝
Satanism 👿✡😈
Pastafarianism 🍝🐙
PiedPiperism 🎷🎺
Comment and Answer the Poll! :)


Starring: Dee Dee (A.D. Miles) DD, Richard Hendricks (Thomas Middleditch) + Jared, Dinesh, Gilfoyle, Monica, Jeff, Colin + ....


This handsome devil over here, is creating a very promising gay dating site.
That's cool.
And him and his man go to church every Sunday.
Loves Bible studies, right?
Also a Christian, right?

Why did you do that?
Why did you say that?
Say what?
Richard, you just told a room full of tech people that I'm a (whispers) Christian.
I'm not openly Christian.
Thanks a lot, man.
You just outed me.

Guys, it can't be that big of a deal, right?
Why should it be? America loves Christians. Muslims are the enemy.
Well, that's true in most of America, but not in Silicon Valley, sadly.
"Sadly"?
You can be openly polyamorous. And people here will call you brave.
You can put micro-doses of LSD in your cereal, and-- and people will call you a pioneer.
But the one thing you cannot be is a Christian.
to be illegitimate, and it's clear that they are the source of the majority of the world's problems.
But, fuck, Richard, even I wouldn't just... out a Christian like that.
Yeah, it was kinda fucked up.
Cool man, thanks.

What the fuck did you do over there?
So I just got off the phone with Colin over at K-Hole, and while he loves your tech, he's considering blowing up the deal.
What? Just because one of my CEOs is Christian?
It freaks people out in the Valley!
Okay, so what do you want me to do, Monica?
You want me to drop DeeDee just because he's Christian?
The company's not Christian. It's gay...
which is fine, right?
Yeah! No, that-- that plays great.
Okay, apologize for outing him, of course, but you need to make sure he keeps quiet about this.
All right, 'cause it's not just about losing K-Hole, it's way worse than that.
Let's put it this way.
Would you want to go from being a rock band to being...
(whispers) a Christian rock band?
Oh, shit!

A CEO and a gay CEO.
I don't even know what normal is anymore, Richard.
It's been such a crazy 24 hours, you know?
Gossip travels so fast in the Valley.
I'll be lucky if my parents ever talk to me again.
Your parents aren't Christian?
I'm from Palo Alto.
You know, my dad says my lifestyle makes him sick.
He just wants his gay son back.
And he's okay with the gay part?
He's gay.
Oh.
Check it out.
Oh, oh, oh.
You like it?
It's good. I guess... maybe it's just a little busy?
Like, um, there's one word too many.
One word?
Well, I like the gay part.
If anything, it could be more gay. You should gay it up,
and then, I like the "proud" part.
(gulps) It's just the...
Christian part.
Look, Richard, this is great,
because now I can be gay and a Christian.
Or just be gay!
Don't be a Christian!

Thanks for dropping FirstSight.
Jesus, my board would have nailed me to a cross.
Oh, good, there he is.
What's he doing here?
Truly open means "open to everyone."
No matter how repugnant their views are.
How ignorant or stupid,
or, to be honest, totally fucking wrong.
And, look, who are we to judge, right?
There's some people out there that believe that we're living in a computer simulation.
Well, that is supported by the evidence.
What?
Uh, it's basic probability theory.
...
We have to bring it into existence.
Otherwise, it'll find out who didn't believe in it, and punish them.
Guys, I was wrong.
Um, Deedee is... not in. He's actually very much out.
So... do-over on the whole speech.
Fuck that guy!
Christians Suck!


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