Here is my advice about eye contact. I get a lot of questions about eye contact from people with social anxiety—and they are often surprised by what I tell them. We need to understand why it’s a problem, and then focus on what to do. I outline my view of the eye contact rules, to help reduce performance demands and the belief that we’re doing something wrong. Having simple rules is important when the threat system shuts down our natural social engagement abilities. Surprisingly, the key to eye contact is signaling that you recognize and care about the other person, and this focus on helping others is a key piece of shifting out of social anxiety.

If you are interested, you can get a lot more in-depth information on treatment techniques in my new social anxiety book here: https://geni.us/DatingWithoutFear

We'll talk about:

0:00 - YouTube question
0:41 - WHY eye contact is so hard in social anxiety
1:50 - The pros and cons of reduced eye contact
2:41 - We DON’T want direct eye contact
4:03 - Eye contact rules when listening
4:59 - Eye contact rules when speaking
6:08 - The emphasis of compassion in eye contact
7:28 - My book is out :)

I'm Dr. Thomas Smithyman, a clinical psychologist making videos to help people overcome social anxiety.

QUESTION — Have a question about anything related to social anxiety? Post in the comments section of this video.

MY BOOK
Out now: https://geni.us/DatingWithoutFear

ONLINE GROUP THERAPY
I’m co-leading an online self-compassion group with Marianne Stout, PhD. Open to TX residents.
https://www.anxietyaustin.com/groups/...

ONLINE THERAPY
I'm not currently accepting new patients for online therapy.

INSTAGRAM
Follow me here:   / socialanxietyequation  

PODCASTS
📱 Subscribe and Listen to the Anxious in Austin Podcast here::
Apple: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast...
Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/4xUWe9A...

Subscribe to my channel Here:    / @drthomassmithyman  

My mission here is to use video to help people overcome social anxiety. Most people with social anxiety never seek help, and those who do usually wait 16 years! Treatment is effective but people don't know about it. I'd like that to change, and I'd really appreciate any help.




PLEASE READ
If you or someone you know is in immediate danger, please call a local emergency telephone number or go immediately to the nearest emergency room. do I